From broken woman to slave

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2005 February

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brought into the open
02.24.05 (1:38 pm)   [edit]


It finally happened, I was taken from the lodge and brought to the City. Never had felt so torn, so angry, so helpless and yet so dependant on Him. I was able to see Him but briefly before He was off to attend to matters that would be of no concern to me.Once He was gone, I learned that the Mistress of the House is His daughter. Finding she was with child and has another to tend to will give me plenty to keep busy. I have also met the head of His chain, tavi who has given me the task of keeping Mistress Kyrstens chambers clean as well as her son's. Each day I work at cleaning and then when I have some free time I explore the house and its grounds. For now I tend to remain away from the others in the House but I know I need to be about to tend to the Free more.

Its so hard to be in the kennels at night knowing that others have the chance to be with Him in His chambers. Kings His hold over me is nearly complete and there is little I can do to change such although truth be told I dont want to fight against what is happening to me any more. So for now I do my best, clad in scant silks that hug my form, tending to my chores.

He did surprise me one night by visiting the kennels as I rested there. But the visit was too brief and it left me only craving Him more. I knew what I was doing when I accepted His collar but I had little idea of just how helpless I would be to Him and my emotions. For now my thoughts and feelings will be shared here as I strive to be a pleasing kajira.



Broken and branded
02.13.05 (9:01 pm)   [edit]


He finally returned after being away so long. When i first heard His voice i thought i was dreaming it. But then the cage door opened and then i knew He was back. Crawling to Him i realized just how much i had missed Him, that i needed Him. Drawing me close, He told me that He was pleased at how pleasing i was found while He was gone. Then the moment of truth came. Asking me if i wished my torment to end, He said all i had to do was say what if felt and what i needed and it would stop. There was no more denying to myself what He could already see. Without barely a thought to the words i let spill forth, i gave up the life i once had for life now at His feet wearing His collar.

For the briefests of moments there was sadness underlying the crush of emotions i felt by submitting to Him. Gone would be all that i had garnered during my envars as a Free Woman. Gone also would be contact with my children for now i have no past, no family. Now i am just a slave, a piece of property, an owned pet. There is a small sadness that I will not be able to see them into adulthood and settling into their choosen Castes, but i know this shall pass in time. So many emotions fill me right now, i scarely know what to think. It seems i am scared, happy, freer than before, eager, and even needy. When He removed the leather collar that has graced my neck during my "training", i felt strangely lost, empty and more naked than i already was at His feet. Then when the band of silver steel was locked about my throat, i felt complete.

Scarely had the collar been locked into place when He wished to see just how much i missed Him and needed Him. There was no need for further urging. Kneeling before Him, i took Him within my mouth until such time i told to truely show how much i needed Him. Climbing onto His lap there was no holding back what had been denied my body. Releasing time and time again it seemed each time was stronger and more explosive until i thought i could take no more. Once He released deep inside me, i was pleased to the floor in a not so gentle heap at His feet.

What happened after that surprised me and i am sure it surprised even Master. Laying there spent and twitching, i pressed my cheek to His boot and begged to be marked as His slave. Detrik was watching and smirked hearing my words. In a matter of moments, i was strapped belly down on a table and restrained as Detrik warmed the branding iron. In a matter of moments it was heated to the desired temperature. With little warning the iron was pressed to the flesh of my left hip for ever marking me as His slave. Of course i was screaming as this occurred there was no way not to.

Laying there whimpering after it was done, He fed me by hand as i remained restrained. There is something freeing at no longer being in control of what happens to you. Already i am becoming more dependant on Him. Yet already He pushes for more enforcing what my place in life will now be. Released from the table once more i am left as a heap on the floor.  i remain there until summoned to come to Him and without question i obey. Kneeling at His feet i am compelled to reveal what has burdened me all this envars here.While i was not commanded to do such i felt i must not keep this from HIm, after all the rule of slaves is nothing is hidden from your Master. So i told Him that i was not born of this planet, that in truth i was a barbarian. It was with great relief to finally say this leaving me truely free now.



The Lodge
02.12.05 (10:27 am)   [edit]


I have been at the lodge now for a couple of hands perhaps more now. Never did I think that Wyld would taking my words as a taunting challenge. Yet it seems He did and now here I am at His lodge. Kings what was I thinking, agreeing to His terms. To be a proper woman in public with Him and what ever He wished in private. He knows this will be a battle of wills and it seems we both are relishing this. I would be lying if I didn't admit that Wyld is a charming and kind man and that well He is also attractive. Kings what am I thinking here, perhaps too many envars have passed since someone has actually gave me any attention or even cared about me.

There is a steady pattern emerging now. Wyld tends to City matters during the day and I am left at the lodge with His man who is commanded to "tend" to me. I should know better, I should scream and fight back at what is happening to me. Yes I do try to fight and resist but He is slow and methodical. Little by little a more of me is exposed to Him, whether its physical or mental. Slowly I find myself needing Him, wanting Him, loosing control to Him.

There has been a change in the routine now. Its just me and His man plus the guards. It seems I am truely alone now againt Wyld. Somehow my guards who have been with me forever it seems have been swayed by Wyld leaving me utterly vunerable now to what has been happening. Virtually treated no better than a slave in training I am reminded of times when I was captured for sport. I fought and resisted but this is different, its harder to resist what is happening to me. Kept naked, displayed for those in the lodge compound and even tormented.

I feel my resolve to hang on slipping away. Perhaps I have grown tired of being alone, of hiding my past, of hiding what ever I feel. I have been kept in she sleen mode now for two days maybe its three but I can no longer tell one day from the next. Kept on the on the verge of release for the last day or so I can no long hold on to what I was. Caged now most of the day and all evening I lay in the corner whimpering in a dazed agony. Barely given enough to eat and drink my form as become sleeker. The daily "walks" have caused my form to tone more. I lay there now curled in the cage no longer moving whimpering His name. My body aches, my flesh reacts to the slightest touch or movement.

My fate lies in His hands, although I imagine He has known all along what He was going to do. This combination of charm, honor, kindness and subtle ruthlessness and brutality makes Him ohhh soooo dangerous and hard for me to deny how much I need Him and belong to Him.